If you are the father or mother of a teenager, it is more than likely that you already know what it is that your child is rebelling at you. Some adolescents do it mildly and others more severely, but all, in one way or another, rebel against their parents. They do not do it because they want conflicts or because they love their parents less, they do it simply, as a way to reaffirm themselves and show the identity that they are forming in their personality.
When you were a teenager, it is more than likely that your parents also had to deal with your rebellion, but now that you are a parent, things have changed for you.
When teenagers rebel
For adolescents to rebel is normal, it is an act of affirmation of their independence. They want to show how they are separated from their parents and that they have a say in the decisions of their own lives. It is called “rebellion” because it consists of a constant and intense confrontation between the adolescent and his parents.
For parents, this type of rebellion can be spontaneous and illogical, but in order to cope with this behavior, it is important to understand why this happens and what are the causes of this behavior.
Causes of rebellion in adolescents
There are many reasons why your child can be rebellious, and it is important that you understand him. To do this, we are going to tell you about the most common causes:
- Independence. Your teenager wants to be independent because he is on the way to being an adult, leaving his childhood behind. It is an intermediate phase where they tend to defy the rules and not listen to what their parents say.
- Differences between children and parents. Teens question the rules and may start to differ with the tastes of their parents. This can lead to conflicts.
- Impulsiveness. Adolescents are impulsive and that is why their decisions are sometimes not the most correct. The adolescent may seek excitement or approval so they may not think rationally.
- Group pressure. The adolescent brain wants to impress his peers and therefore can do things to be accepted by them. Even if parents don’t approve of that kind of attitude or behavior.
- Brain change. In adolescence there is a change in the structure of the brain, the brain connections do not fully develop until after the age of 20. This affects decision making so rebellious behavior is common.
- Hormones It is known that adolescents have hormonal changes and this can cause drastic changes in thinking. Mood and behavior can be impaired.
Although the word “rebellious” may sound negative to parents, in reality, it is necessary for the development of adolescents and for them to grow into balanced adults. Although it is a difficult stage, it is absolutely necessary.
Being rebellious is not negative
That teenagers are rebellious does not have to be negative, in fact, it has its good part. Some good things are:
- Teens can openly express their opinion to parents. Mature conversations start to appear when teens try to discuss the rules.
- They are more independent. Teenagers actually become more independent in different situations. They start to do things for themselves.
- They behave better socially. They begin to understand the importance of appropriate social behavior. Also, they will learn from their own mistakes.
- It feels like an adult. The adolescent “rehearses” to be an adult and this is good for him. Healthy rebellion is important so that you begin to think like an adult in a responsible way.
- Increase confidence. You begin to have more self-confidence and a good self-concept. Assertiveness and self-confidence appear.